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is there something wrong...?

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-sigh-... sa wakas tapos na rin ang isang subject for summer... tapos na rin ang nutrition and diet therapy class.. -sigh- sana lang pasado ko sa exam kanina... ewan ko ba kung anong problema ko at wala ata ako sa hulog...-sigh-... as in wala ako sa hulog mag-exam.. tama ba daw un...??!?!?! Lord.. ano bang nangyayari sa kin...!?!?!

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for the past days, ndi ko alam kung bakit ganto ang nararamdaman ko... ung tipong ang bigat na medyo ndi mo alam kung bakit parang ndi masaya na ewan...?!?!?! ung tipong there's something but you can't figure it out...?!?!?! am i sinning?! or have i done something bad...?!?!?!

i feel weak... parang laging wala sa mood.. tipong wala lang... and i don't want to feel this way.. ung tipong laging parang walang laman ang utak ko na tipong parang hangin lang ang laman... tapos parang tinatamad pa...?!??! i hate it!!! as in! I HATE IT!

ndi ko alam kung galit ba ko o kung ano man.. kung galit man ako, kanino..?!?! [and in the first place, marunong ba kong magalit...?!?!?!]

feeling ko ang layo-layo ko kay Lord.. may mga time of the day na ang ok naman. pero may times na ndi.. ung tipong parang gusto ko lang tumahimik... [dahil ba tahimik si Lord..?!]

ano ba talagang problema ko..?!?!? when im praying, seems like there are lots of distractions.. ang topak... i can't focus.. and nakakainis na ang kaaway kase sobrang ginugulo niya ko!!! grrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hmmmm...

whatever im feeling right now.. i know that GOd knows what's truly in my heart...

GOD IS GREATER THAN MY HEART, AND KNOWS ALL THINGS

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i've talked to a friend yesterday... i met him when we were in baguio.. nung Jrev... and ang kulit lang.. eheheheh. kase parang tipong close kami.. sabi ba naman kase, ang tagal na daw naming ndi nagkita...?! e malamang! kase naman ndi kami close.. ehehehehheheeh.... pero ang kewl.. ehehehehhe...

pero maaga pa lang, i have to be watchful and guard my heart.. iba kase ung mga pinagsasasabi niya kahapon.. -sigh-...

nways, i should be thankful for these things.. kase alam ko na may nanggugulo sa kin... magtaka na lang ako kung walang temptations sa tabi-tabi..

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Nothing can separate me from God's love!

Comments

leeflailmarch said…
i might be wrong but i really wanna say this. kase you're a very good friend. just my opinion.

here goes.

umm, to be honest, i think you have distanced yourself far too much from people already. i have noticed that you're actually trying to be closer again (or i might be wrong, then again) to your friends but there's just something about you now. it's not a negative thing because it was built for, because, and by God pero basta, when you're there parang iba e. maybe you have built that wall around yourself too high already and maybe nasanay na kami lagi na may mataas kang wall around you. i'm not assuming naman that you're trying to reach out to us now. ang kapal ko naman. pero maybe God wants you to enjoy life, which is truly His most extraordinarily special gift for us, together with other people, as much as you enjoy alone time in His Most Holy Presence.

anyways, that was just a thought. 'cause that's what i'm doing.

and btw, i've TOTALLY abstained from drinking na. that's a promise. slap me when you see me drink. hehe.
1:23 AM
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